December 20, 2010 was the beginning of the end for us in our previous ministry. It was the beginning of a trial that sparked these posts: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
To bring you up to speed...we're still in our house. It has not sold and we may not be here much longer. Joel still has secular work and we're still looking for a new ministry.
We have learned so much this year...things we knew but really learned on a much more personal level. We joined Maranatha Baptist Church and have really, really enjoyed this ministry. We've made some new friends and learned lots of lessons....we had a lot of growing to do (and we still do!!). God has been good and gracious and kind and loving and we do not deserve one bit of His favor.
I've made an effort this year to try and make Christmas really special for our boys. Last year I was so numb and hurting that Christmas was just a hold-it-together-and-don't-fall-apart kind of holiday. As much as I tried to focus on the true meaning of Christmas, my selfish pride was focused on my own situation and the despair I felt inside. Don't get me wrong...much of the pain is still there. Leaving a place (and people) you love is never easy.
I write all of this to say that life is still hard at times. I still wonder what God is doing and how He is going to do it. I still have to work to focus on Christ at Christmas and not myself. I still lay awake some nights and ask God when we will be through transitioning....when will we find a new ministry....when will life move from waiting to being normal again? Through it all, I KNOW that my God is good. He has a plan. The details are worked out, the plan is in place and I get to watch Him work in our family through it all.
So this Christmas, I will worship with my church family and marvel that so many years ago He came. My redeemer chose to come and rescue me from my sin and despair. Nothing says Merry Christmas more than that.